The Journal of Truthful Fallacies

The Trouble with Numbers

The situation I am in, is the worst I have ever been in, in my life, at least financially speaking. I have no money-actually, I have about 50p to my name, in America, that is 1 dollar. No phone credit, my last drop of water, and wheat bread and tuna to eat for lunch. Oh, I have other food, but that would consist of using other condiments, which would cost money to buy, which I do not have.

4-the number of Visa Reps I have spoken to
2-number of payments made to the Visa company
10-number of days until Paris, making the situation worse.
0-amount left on my credit
50p-amount left litteraly in my pocket
5 euro-amount left litteraly in my pocket that is unable to help me
A lot-the amount I am taking iun order to never be broke here again or when I get home, hopefully to last a good month
none-the amount of compassion and concern this has rendered from my friend
About 7gbp-the amount I owe The Rich girl, for using her phone to call Visa (while she complained like a whiney bitch the entire time)
10gbp-the amount I was going to borrow from her to top up my phone, so I would not have to be dependent on her to be around today incase the card does not work when it becomes 9am eastern standard time, when my bank opens


I am so eternally stressed. I cannot eat properly (b/c one, there is not much to eat, or drink unless I drink tea all day.) I told the Rich Girl, look, I am stressed, give me the 10 gbp to hold me over, b/c I know I am going to have to call the Visa company again. No she says, wait until my cousin puts money into the account, (what money? She is probbaly not going to be able to put more than, at max 20-25 and MAYBE 50 but that is a stretch, into my acount) That is nothing in terms of money, but it is something.

So, she is handling this all nonchalantly, why? Because she is rich, she has family here, and if worse comes to worse, they would drive here in their cars, and feed her, give her money to exist-not to mention this would never happen to her, as she is rich and mommy and daddy will pay for anything. I have to admit, she told me that she would give me, if needed, enough money to survive here until I left (20 days, starting today) and that is a short time, but that is a blow to my ego, and I do not go for that. But, if it what I have to do, then I will do it. But what she doesn't understand is what it is like to be over in another country, broke, litteraly. NO money. Not even a pound to call a cousin, or family member in NY.

I couldn't even call my mom on Mothers day, b/c I ran out of calling credit. How fucked up is this. Instead of being compassionate about this, the Rich Girl finds it funny. I cannot do anything-no tube, no milk, no water, no NOTHING.

When and if this credit card ever works, I am at the pt. that I do not care about what I will owe in the future, I am taking out a big amount. I am not asking any other non family member for help regarding this matter ever again in my life. This is the LAST time I am going to be officially broke, I gurantee. No more.

2-times within the school year I have been officially broke
6-months ago, the last time I was officialy broke
0-the next time I will ever be broke again-period.

I am writing in this blog, to keep from going insane, because if today, I still have no money, I cannot gurantee what I will be doing to myself or anyone. I am really on the edge. I was not able to sleep until 5am, and now I am awake at 11:08, I cannot sleep. I just cannot. If I have no money in my hands litterally by tonight, I will not be sleeping at all tonight. I just won't. I am that wound up, and I get this stressed when something very unsettling and that causes a lot of worry, happens to me. I am just frail nerve-wise and extreme stress, wrecks havek on my body:

Since April, I have broken out with disgusting, and unusually bad breakouts on my otherwise, good skin. NOt only this, but they have not been going away, just staying on my face, this morning, growing larger and larger I swear, although I just used some of the Rich Girls presciption only cream on my face. It worked in Italy for a few days, but ever since I got back to London, it doesn't work. My hair is horrible too, and needs to be professionally done, but of course I do not have the money to do that. I just pray to God that this card works today. God, have I learned my lesson: do not fuck around with money-ever. Do not spend in amounts, unless you have an incoming stream of cash flow to make up for it, or your mommy and daddy are rich and can bail you out. Do not depend on other people to help you out of your problems, because either way, you will feel guilty, or they will imply that you should be. Never ever use a credit card unless you have the money in hand to pay for it back, unless you are like me, and had to use one. So many more lessons......

I sincerely this is the last lesson I will ever be taught regarding finances. From now on, I will keep my own checkbook up to date and do the normal bank account things that everyone else does, you know, like a grown up.

Well, this is all I have to say, I pray that today, everything finally goes through so I can get back to living my regular life.

posted by The Eternal Student @ 11:15 AM